Feel Like You’ve Lost Yourself? How God Designed You for Passion, Purpose, and a Life That Feels Like You

Are you living the life that you want to live?

One of the top regrets of the dying is not living the life that they wanted to live.

Instead, it's living a life of expectation and living a life that they thought they needed to or had to live because of what other people in society told them.

Today we're going to dive into why it's actually a godly thing to pursue our gladness, pursue our passion in our gifts.

And when we do that, we will literally be able to serve the world in such a way that we were made to do.

And so today we're going to dig into why not knowing what we want, why not pursuing our passions and our desires, is actually keeping us from stepping into the world fully, who we're supposed to be.

God wants us to light, to delight in our lives, to delight in Him.

But when we hold all of that back because of expectations and obligations and how we think we have to live, we're missing out on so much more that he has for us.

So that's what we're going to dig into today.

Welcome to Faith Fueled Living, the podcast that equips you to live well spiritually, emotionally, physically, and purposefully.

Each week, we'll dive into conversations and biblical truths to help you strengthen your faith, pursue meaningful work, care for your whole self, and live aligned with what matters most.

All right, I'm going to start off with this statement by Mark Batterson in his book Whisper.

He says, some of us have no idea what we want because we sacrifice our desires on the altar of other people's expectations.

We settle for should we settle for, have to instead of want to.

And then we wonder why we don't feel the joy of the Lord.

It's because we're listening to the wrong voices.

He then goes on to share what Frederick Buckner says, which is, here we go.

The voice we should listen to the most as we choose a vocation is the voice that we might think we should listen to the least.

And that is the voice of our own gladness.

What can we do that makes us the gladdest?

I believe that if it is a thing that makes us truly glad, then it is a good thing.

It is our thing.

And Mark Patterson goes on to say, I might even add, it's a God thing.

And he goes on to talk about in the book, in this chapter, that it's actually people that step into careers or work where they're passionate about it.

Excuse me, where they have a passion for something.

Those people tend to do better, do more for their calling.

Than the people that are just talented.

It's because when we have a passion, we keep going with something, we keep trying things.

And he says, at the end of the day, passion wins the day.

Life is too short not to love what you do, so do what you love.

The key is finding the place where gifts and desires overlap.

God given gifts are what we're best at.

God ordained desires are what we're most passionate about.

And the place where those gifts and desires overlap is a sweet spot.

And of course in the Bible it even says this.

We have different gifts according to the grace given to each of us.

If your gift is prophesizing, then prophecy in accordance to your faith.

If it is serving, then serve.

If it is teaching, then teach.

If it is to encourage, then give encouragement.

If it is giving, then give generously.

If it is to lead, do it diligently.

If it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.

The reality is, if we're being true with ourselves, many of us cannot actually define what it is we want in the future or we can't define.

Where do we feel unsettled or unfulfilled?

Where are we holding back on our passions or really doing the thing that we really want to do but we're not even telling anyone about because we're afraid to rock the boat.

We're afraid to get out of line.

We're afraid to step into a path that we're not certain of how it's going to play out.

And I love something that Bob Goff says.

He says, did the person that you used to adore get buried in the responsibilities of a growing career?

Folding laundry or waiting in the school pickup line?

Is your past shouting so loud you can't hear the future calling your name?

Have you spent so much time and energy trying to meet others expectations of you that you forget what you really want for yourself?

Or maybe you've never taken the time and space you need to meet your real self for the first time.

Who are you?

Who are you really?

And in The Bible in 2 Peter 2:19, it says, you are a slave to whatever controls you.

My question to all of us is this.

Are we letting our expectations, our beliefs in the life that we should live, in the path or career we should be on or that we are on?

Are we letting that control us?

Are we letting ourselves stay tied up and bound by what the world dictated that our life should look like instead of actually following our heart and what God has put on it for us to be doing in the world?

And yes, serving our family, loving Our family, well, loving our community, our church families, like all of that is part of our purpose.

And so I am not saying just our career matters.

Absolutely.

It's all the things we're doing.

But my question is, are we feeling uninspired or are we feeling held back or unsettled?

Or we just know, we have a knowing that what we're doing, that there's more for us that something we used to love that we put on hold for other important things that we know we should go towards it, but we just don't know how and we don't know if we really should.

Right.

We question ourselves.

And so my question is, is that actually the world or even the devil holding us back from everything God wants for us?

In other words, what is the world missing out on when we don't step into who we truly are?

In the book Unlocked by George Mumford, he says our work is to bring forth what is inside of us.

And he says when we get in touch with our authentic selves, we transform in our and are transformal.

Our performance is athletics, work, art, business, relationships, all aspects of life changes.

We unlock our uniqueness, uniqueness in huge reserves of energy and the feeling of having found our purpose and direction.

We know who we are and where we're going.

And I would add to that, we know who we are and where we're going in Christ.

Right.

Because what I'm talking about is not something selfish.

What I'm talking about is when we do know who we are, when we do know what our desires are, when we do know what brings us joy, when we do know what brings us gladness, when we know bring what we're passionate about and we pursue that, everything changes because we're going to step into rooms, we're going to be part of conversations.

We're going to be doing things that change the world.

Through our work, through our passion, through our hobby, through our, you know, the things like the encouraging or leading or speaking over people or teaching, whatever it is we're good at.

But when we hold.

Hold that down, when we don't step into those gifts and those passions, we are leaving stuff on the table that we're meant to show up in the world doing.

Maybe you love poetry, yet you've never shared a poem with anyone.

You've never published the book.

Or maybe you love singing, but you've been too afraid to sing in front of other people because you're not a professional.

Maybe you're so good at sewing, yet you've never shared the gift with someone else to teach other people.

So, friends, my point is maybe you are doing much of what you're called to in the world, but you know, there's something more.

You have this feeling that there's this untapped part of you or an unfulfilled part of you.

That is because God is calling you into sharing your gifts, sharing your passions, sharing the way he's designed you in the world.

And so today, I just want to step into a couple things you can ask yourself, a couple things you can do to try to reignite the spark within you that's going to help you do just that in your life.

Before I jump into that, I want to share this with you.

Bob Goff says, here's my question for you.

What do you need to quit?

Is it a job or a relationship or a hurt or a grudge?

Sometimes leading means leaving.

Is it your time to quit something you have been hanging on to?

He says, I get it.

Quitting something you're good at can be hard.

But don't let your caution get in the way of your obedience.

Keep being strong and courageous and when you quit, go big.

So Bob has this practice where he quits something every Thursday.

Now, mind you, he has a lot going on, right?

He's a writer.

He does workshops.

He has nonprofits.

I mean, he has a lot.

The list goes on and on from there, right?

He does charitable work.

So when he says he's quitting something, he's doing a lot of things.

So his quitting something might be something small some of the weeks.

But I think the point is sometimes we don't have space for the next thing that we need to step into.

We don't have space to pursue a passion.

We don't have space to see if a hobby can become our calling.

Maybe we're holding on to, like you said, a hurt or a grudge, and it's holding us back from doing the work we're meant to do in our next season.

So one, we need to do more self reflecting.

We really need to search inside of our hearts, search in our lives, in our schedules and our patterns, and say, what is life draining at this point?

What is the thing holding me down or keeping me stuck at where I'm at when I know part of me wants to move in a different direction?

I want to take a different path than the one I've been on for the last five years, 20 years, 50 years.

So that's the first thing is we get to get honest with ourselves.

This is a great thing we can do.

We can write down what is life giving and what is life draining in my life right now, and is it something I need to pause or stop?

It could be a volunteer position you have.

It could be that you keep saying yes to something even when you, it's wearing you down and it's wearing you out.

Now, I'm not talking about responsibilities that we must do.

For instance, you have young children at home and you need to get dinner on the table.

You need to feed them, right?

Okay.

Some things we can't quit.

Maybe we can make it easier on ourselves, but we can't quit it.

I'm talking about the things that we're holding on, almost like a security blanket that's keeping us from stepping into the unknown, from getting curious about what's deep within us that we really want to pursue or we want to explore an idea.

And I'm not saying go and quit your job tomorrow without any path or plan in the future.

But what I am saying is when you get curious, when you start asking yourself, what is it about this thing that I, I want to look into.

For instance, I love taking pictures.

I take pictures of everything.

I love photography.

I am by no means a professional, nor do I have I put the time in to be a professional.

I enjoy it for now.

That's enough, right?

It's a hobby of mine.

Most of the time I only use my iPhone.

Now I have other cameras, but I just find that then I have to bring a bigger bag and it's just a hassle.

And since I'm not trying to mostly sell my art, my photography, then I don't need the bigger camera.

But my point is, if we're using this as an example, my, my passion for photography, well, for me that would be how could I improve taking photos?

Or how could I learn a little bit more?

How could I take more photos of places I enjoy photographing?

So that would be my curiosity intersecting with taking action.

It doesn't have to be something big.

I'm not going to go out tomorrow and become a photographer.

But what it does mean is instead of sitting on that interest, that desire of, or a love of photography, it would mean I do one small thing towards it.

I sign up for photography class or I schedule a day for a mini day excursion and I go take pictures of a town.

I love doing that and I have done that in the past.

But is there one on my calendar for the next, you know, quarter?

If there isn't, maybe that's my small step to move towards the thing I'm interested in.

So for you, what is it and how can you take a step towards it and give yourself that little bit of excitement, of that gladness?

Maybe you love cooking or baking, but you've never tried to offer it to other people.

And once again, I'm not saying that the thing you do or the things you do in the world has to make you money.

What I'm saying though is maybe you love baking, but you've just never thought you could actually make it into something else.

So just get curious and then start writing things down.

I also have a great download you can grab.

If you go to KristenFitch.com, go to my workbook page and it's called Creating a Life, you journaling workbook.

But what's so great about it is there's tons of reflections and lists to fill out and you don't have to do it all or all at one time time.

Go through it and then write in it as you're able, different things.

So I have like a life giving page, a life draining page.

I have pages about what are you curious about, right?

Or passionate about?

I have pages about what, what is the future you want to step into?

You know, like what is it that you want?

There's pages about what are the words you're speaking over yourself, right?

Like, so what are the things people say about you?

Right?

Like what are the positive lovely things your friends or family say about you?

Because when we start recognizing the things instead of staying on autopilot, we start seeing the patterns, we start seeing the things that bring us gladness.

We start seeing the things that maybe get us a little excited and we want to step into more of that.

You'd be shocked.

When we show up in the world with enthusiasm, people pay attention.

People are drawn to people that are passionate and excited about what they're doing.

It's like a magnet when we show up in the world, not just doing work that's meaningful or purposeful.

Yes, Right.

And sometimes the things we're doing are going to be monotonous, right?

Like just like when we have a family or own a home, we have to still clean the toilets and take out the trash.

Not exciting work, but we can do all of our work out of love.

But when we do the work that we're meant to do or do the, like I said, it doesn't have to be work.

But what I mean is when we do, when we show up using our gifts in the world and we are glad about it, when we're passionate about it, when we're excited about it.

Everything shifts because the people are drawn to that excitement.

They're drawn to the thing we're going to share with the world.

Another story I've read, read in one of the books, I think it was one of Mark Batterson's, but he's sharing about a gentleman that plays music.

I forget what instrument, and I don't remember if he does it for his.

His actual job, but he started sharing it with younger people.

And he was just so good.

He was so good.

He was just sharing his gift with some people in the world.

But it moved them, right?

That changed them because he brought forth this gift and his excitement about that music, and that changes people, right?

When we stop showing up out of obligation and because we should, and we start showing up because we want to and because it aligns with what God wants us to be doing, everything shifts, right?

Like it's those goosebump bump moments when you watch something, you hear someone speak, you hear someone play music, they do something, and it's so beautiful that you can't help but be moved.

That is what I'm talking about.

We need to show up in the world more often like that.

Mark Patterson also says this destiny is a decision.

Every little and big decision.

What daily decision do you need to make?

What daily discipline is he saying do you need to start doing?

In other words, how can you make little shifts in your life that move you towards the things that.

That you believe are a gift for you or that you believe you'd like to do more of?

And the other thing we need to ask ourselves is what's holding me back from doing the thing I used to love doing?

Or what's holding me back from the thing I started doing when I was younger.

But life got in the way, right?

We started raising a family, we got married, we took a different path with our careers.

And none of that is bad.

Those are all wonderful things.

But the question is, where did we tamp ourselves down?

Where did we pause that part of ourselves for something else?

And is it time to reawaken that part of us?

Is it time to get curious and do something that moves us towards that love that we have, that gift that we have?

Pastor Jason Laird shares how do we bring God to work?

And he says, first of all, we were created for good work.

God calls us to do good work in the world, and it's our mission field.

And he basically shares a story about his friend who realizes or felt stuck in the work he was doing, right?

Like in his job, he Just felt like, oh, it's going nowhere.

I'm just frustrated.

I'm kind of over it.

Right?

A lot of us can relate to that at some point in our lives.

Maybe we feel that way right now.

And he says, until the friend realized that he's not stuck, he's stationed.

God has stationed him there for this time, right?

For this season.

And Pastor Laird goes on to say, how you see your job will always influence the way you do your job.

That's coming from Genesis.

And he says, let's see your work.

Your.

Our work is when the world gets to see what it looks like to be a Christian.

In other words, yes, we need to step into our gifts.

Yes, we need to step into what we're passionate about, and I encourage you to do that.

But of course, it's also showing up with our best attitude, showing up out of love and kindness and showing them what it looks looks like to have the fruit of the Spirit within us as we show up in the world doing whatever it is we're currently doing, right?

Both in our homes, in our communities, in the daily demands of whatever work or volunteering or whatever it is we're doing.

So.

And he says, are we complaining about work because work becomes sacred based on why you like and how we do it and for who we do it, Right?

So if we're showing up as a faithful Christian in the work, then that's important.

And why am I shifting a little bit between pursuing your gifts and passions and then work?

It's because regardless of where you are at today and what you want to step into, right?

Getting to the place where you, you're living the life that you wanted to live.

We want to get there, but we also don't want to lose sight of what we can do where we're currently at, even if it doesn't feel like the place that we're meant to be long term or in the future, in other words, we are often, I would say most of the time positioned where God can and will use us, no matter where we're at.

And even if it doesn't feel like the place we're going, he wants to use us now if we're open and ready and willing and ask him to use us.

So I don't want us to miss that while we're getting curious, while we're trying to step into maybe something that we have paused or pushed off or moved away from, while I think that's so important.

And God probably wants, as you understand that better and step into that he wants to use you in that way.

But he also wants to use you today in whatever it is you're in.

So whether you are pursuing a passion that you have paused or whether you are just starting to think about this idea until then, and when you get to the other thing, Bob Goff shares this.

You may not spring to your feet in your office or classroom today, but the spirit of joy and celebration can become a larger part of your life than it has been.

Let's lead with joy.

Let this be your lasting legacy.

What makes you want to rise to your feet and dance with joy?

And I would say to you both, find that joy and celebration in your life today, in the season you're in, the work you're doing, and also pursue that gladness in that passion for future endeavors.

Don't wait until it's too late to do the things you want to do, to do the things that you love to do, the things you're passionate about.

I love to travel, but it's partly because it just gives me new words.

It gives me new things to truly to appreciate the Lord, appreciate the world he created.

It just fills me up in a way that many other things don't.

So for me, yes, traveling, we might say, oh, you know, that's just a superficial thing.

But for me, it's not.

Like I said, I love taking pictures.

I love seeing the different flora.

I like seeing, you know, just the different, the natural habitats.

So my point is, go do the things, don't wait.

Because we don't know what our future holds.

We none of us know how long we have.

But don't look back on your life when we're near the last days and have regrets.

We want to step into all the things.

And that truly means we need to not live our lives like Mark Patterson says, trying to get to the end of life safely.

So in other words, let's step into what God I know is calling us into, which is more adventure.

He never said he'd promise us safety.

I mean, as far as, like, not everything we're going to do feels safe, not everything we're going to or not all the places we're going to go, but feel safe, right?

It makes us be vulnerable.

It makes us trust him.

But he is calling us into new adventures.

He is calling us into new places.

And we have to be willing and ready to step off the path of obligation, expectation, and into these new adventures with God.

Neil Brewer says this.

If desire never moves into seeking, is it really desire or merely curiosity?

He says, because it is only as I seek the object of my desire that that I'll actually obtain it.

And that's kind of referencing Psalm 20, Psalm 27:4.

So here's what I want to leave you with today.

God wants us to come to him, right?

He wants to get our heart right in alignment with him and what he wants in the world.

So each day let's meet Him.

Let's get ourselves right, right in our our hearts and our spirits so that we can go and do our best work to serve the people around us each day.

But also don't ignore your passions.

Don't ignore the things that God has put on your heart, those desires that are there in that God sized dream or that God given dream because he wants to do even more through and with you when you step into that as well.

And I'll just leave you with these words from Chase the Lion by Mark Batterson says we don't die when our hearts stop beating.

We die when our hearts stop skipping a beat in pursuit of our passions, when our hearts stop breaking for the things that break the heart of God.

Friends, we are meant to go after our passions because God has put them there on our hearts.

And so let's show up in the world.

Let's reignite those passions.

Let's reignite that spark within us that's going to shine an even brighter light towards God.

So I encourage you and like I said, go over to KristinFitch.com and grab one of my free workbooks.

You can either grab the Creating a life you love journaling workbook or the Reignite your passion workbook.

Both are great places to start.

They're very different.

The Reignite your passion is a five day jump start.

And then the creating a life you love is more like journaling pages and lists.

So it just depends on which one or which direction you want to go.

But I encourage you, go grab it.

And then also when you grab that or register with your email, then you'll be invited to join my get my Faith Friday emails where I just encourage you through life from a faith lens.

So I can't wait for you to step into your future.

I can't wait for you to take that little spark that you feel that might be being held back and shine it into the world.

Because I promise when that when your gladness starts coming forth from you, you change, you become a different person, you show more of the fruit of the spirit in your life because you're operating from a place of gladness and joy in the world.

So go out, reignite that passion because I do think that God is not calling us just to be faithful and trust him 100%.

He wants that from us, but he wants to get our hearts centered, our hearts right.

He wants us to be joyful and delight in him, delight in his world, but also delight in the things he's designed us to be good at and designed us to show up in the world doing so.

Until next time, have a great week.

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